356dayMom Blog

I have always wanted to write. I like to journal. I like to talk to people about pretty much anything (except I was raised not to discuss politics or religion in groups, so those topics will be off the table). I have challenged myself to write every day for a year. Click here for my list to date.

Day 347 – They Really Aren’t All Bad

They Really Aren't All BadI was at Starbucks and was watching the barista serving the two young women in front of me. One did all the talking and one looked very shy. She was sporting purple hair, goth clothing, and chains everywhere.

She had that look that probably meant she gets “those” looks from adults. Maybe some cruel remarks from kids.

The barista went out of her way to draw her into the conversation. She was just a young person herself. And I was really touched watching her.

There are a lot of people in this world that could learn from her.

And with a world where it would seem, via the media and such, that all young kids do these days is bully each other, it was lovely to see something further from the truth.

Because there are a lot of really amazing, awesome young people out there. I watch my sons and their friends and see how much they do to volunteer and give back to their community.

And they are quick to point out if I’m being too judgmental.

So really, they aren’t that bad. Just give them a chance to prove themselvesl

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Day 346 – I Hate Depression

I Hate DepressionI hate depression.

I hate it probably more than any other disease. More than cancer. And heart disease.

I hate depression because it is a disease but yet people still feel that it is something you can control. That you just have to think happy to be happy.

I have had some crappy stuff happen to me in my life, and people always say to me “how do you stop from getting depressed?”

I don’t stop from getting depressed because depression isn’t something that just happens because sad or bad things happen. I get sad from some of the stuff that happens to me. I get really sad when stuff happens to my family. But I don’t get depressed because I do not have depression.

And the word depression is thrown around far too much by people who are just sad.

Depression is a life altering disease. Some people manage their depression well with medications, self help, meditation, yoga, exercise and other healthy choices.

Others manage their depression by finding illegal drugs, alcohol and other hazardous ways.

And sometimes depression just can’t be handled by anything, and the suffering person goes down the path of no return.

Which breaks my heart. Because in the path behind are people wondering what they could have done differently. How could they have helped. If only I had helped or stopped or said something nice.

But the problem with depression is there are no right answers. There is no perfect way to talk to someone with depression. As much as you see them as brilliant, they don’t see it. As much as you tell them they are amazing, they don’t feel it.

The world lost another young soul to suicide last night. And probably not just one. And in the path behind are those who are grief stricken and wondering, what could they have done differently.

I know our world needs to find the cure for cancer and heart disease and a multitude of other things.

But really and truly I believe that we need to find a way to cure depression more than anything else. Because in a world where depression is not only defeating the suffering person but it is also affecting their world around them, the more positive the energy we can have around us the better we will be. And while you may not be a believer in positive energy, I am. And I would hope that cancer and other diseases wouldn’t bother showing up if the world was full of positive happy energy.

Just a small ask. Because I do hate depression.

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Day 345 – Is Empathy a Bad Thing?

Is Empathy a Bad ThingDoesn’t it amaze you how your heart can actually hurt when you feel empathy for someone.

Sometimes it would be so much easier if didn’t feel things for others. Think how much easier our lives would be if we had no empathy. If nothing that happened to others made us feel anything.

But unfortunately we are not built that way.

We watch movies (that we know perfectly well are not real) and bawl like babies when something sad happens. I mean big, huge sobs when you watch shows like Steel Magnolias. We all know Julia Roberts didn’t really die. But the heartbreak of mom Sally Field in that movie makes us all cry like it was real.

A bunch of us parents were standing at the park last night watching our teenage boys at rugby practice. A dad was there with his two small children, one of whom was having the biggest screaming meltdown. Every one of us moms were feeling so bad for him (the dads, not so much). It was like it was our own children screaming. And there was nothing we could do but feel bad for him.

The worst of course is when our kids are going through things. The joy they go through makes our hearts sing. Their sadness make us heartbroken.

Now of course, if we didn’t have empathy, then our world would be a disgusting place to live. Just a place full of people with no hearts.

So we will keep our empathy.

But it would be nice to be able to limit how much we have to give out in a day. Because some days it is just way too much.

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Day 344 – Paying Respect to a Day

Paying Respect to a DayThis past weekend there has been a lot of news marking the 10 year anniversary of Hurricane Katrina. It is hard to believe that it has been ten years since those states were devastated by the aftermath of the hurricane.

Every time I hear Hurricane Katrina mentioned I am also reminded of my own personal hurricane that happened for me ten years ago too.

On the days when the news was all about the hurricane, I lay in a hospital bed with viral meningitis. I spent two weeks in hospital and while I couldn’t watch the television very much, I did listen to the news. So I was very aware of what was going on.

So each year, when they mark the anniversary of Katrina, I give a little respect to my own personal hurricane.

I learned so much from my time battling that illness. I don’t mind thinking about it. I don’t like to dwell on it, but I do like to give it some recognition. Because it shut me down for awhile. It made me respect my health a lot more. And my life.

It taught me to keep a positive attitude when all I wanted to do was slip into a state of feeling sorry for myself.

No matter how bad I was feeling, and it was a long time of feeling terrible, my personal hurricane wasn’t as bad as Katrina. And that was an easy reminder to stay positive.

Because all those people had to live with so much more – losing their loved ones, their possessions, their sense of security.

I didn’t lose anything when I got sick. I would actually say I gained more. Sure I lost some weight. I lost time with my children. I lost a lot of work time.

But I learned so much more. And most importantly I have never taken life for granted since that day.

So I remember my day and honour those who were affected by Hurricane Katrina.

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Day 343 – The End of Summer

The End of SummerI can’t believe that another summer is almost coming to an end.

It seems like we wait all year for those months of summer, and then they are gone. And this year we were actually given an extra week thanks to the dates of Labour Day. So almost a full extra week.

But I also find by this point that I’m almost ready for summer to end. Because even though I know I was working all summer, I swear things slow down to a much less productive work rate. People are away so questions can’t get answered, decisions don’t get made, and the lure of the sunshine pulls me out of my office one too many times.

I know within weeks of wishing summer away I will be regretting that decision.

But for now, I’m excited about fall temperatures, warm sweaters, time in my office to get things accomplished and more.

Last year when I saw Carmen Spagnolia and had my intuitive reading, she said my January 1 was actually September 1. It is the time for me to set goals, make realistic deadlines and start up those projects I’ve been delaying.

Therefore, since it is August 31, I will have to enjoy today like it is New Year’s Eve!

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Day 342 – Is the Road To Success Worth It?

Is the Road to Success Worth ItI watched a documentary on the making of a ballet (Ballet 422).

It was really interesting to watch the choreographer work through his ideas from beginning to the premiere of the ballet.

But at the very beginning of the documentary, they mention that the 25 year old choreographer is one of 50 dancers in the lowest rank of the New York Ballet Company, known as the Corps de Ballet.

I’m sorry, but saying he is the lowest rank makes it sound like his is a terrible dancer. But he is one of 50 of the thousands and thousands that vie for positions in the ballet each year.

Which got me thinking of the long and hard road that elite dancers and elite athletes take to get to the top of their profession. And how there is very little room at the top for very many of them.

I watch Olympic athletes compete and I wonder what pushes them to continue. Those athletes that will never take home a medal. May not even ever make a final game or race. What keeps them going for many years.

I know I could never do that. I don’t have the patience or the drive to be that person. To sacrifice for years and years and to never reach where you want to go.

In Canada, elite athletes in most sports make very little money. So it is only their love of the sport that keeps them going. Maybe I have never felt that passionate about anything to push myself that hard.

But I am envious and awed by those not only at the top of their art, but also for those that work so hard and while may never get to the very top, they still are part of at least the lower ranks!

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